Posts

MUSE: 喜欢是什么感觉

Image
喜欢,很简单的说出口,很白的两个字。 没有爱那么深、那么可怕,却也没有暧昧那么不明不白。
喜欢是什么感觉?
喜欢是飞翔,是知道不会突然坠落的安全。 喜欢是被带着飞,是知道最后你会安全着地。 喜欢是享受风吻着你的脸,但也知道风停后你依然暖和。
喜欢一个人是什么感觉?
是他站得太靠近时,你的心似乎忘了跳几下。 是他工作时,你就想一直望着那身影。 是他说话时,你想和他聊一整天。
我喜欢一个人。
喜欢独处,因为只要不期待别人的喜欢,自己就不觉得需要那份喜欢,也就没了失望。 独自一人的我,可以去寻找自己喜欢的生活方式,做自己想做的事。 没有必要顾虑另外一半的感受,因为我的人生中不存在另一个他。
我喜欢一个人。
那种想看见一个人在某个地方出现的希望。 那种期待能与他聊天的机会。 那种让自己生活中有一种莫名的冲劲。 那种想抓牢却又想看他飞翔的莫名其妙。
我不喜欢我喜欢一个人。
期待那份喜欢的回应,那份可能永远都不会来的回应。 想为自己而活,却又贪图那个让我有多一点能量的他。 幻想着种种的如果,但也明白可能没有如果。 这种期待、这份喜欢,只会带给自己那揪心的难受。
日子久了,喜欢一个人变成一种又爱又恨的感觉。
我想学会怎么把自己的心锁死,我常提醒自己不要用情。 但人是善变动物,提醒了也会忘、也会固执。 常常提醒,不是不会忘记,而是会厌恶自己的提醒。
逆风,更适合飞翔。
我喜欢独来独往、喜欢自己飞。
日子久了,我有可能真的忘了。
喜欢一个人是什么感觉?



P.S. 我是骗子。

Hello 2018

Image
2017 was not a good year of blogging for me since apparently, I only posted once and it was quite a... sad entry. Here's to changing the frequency of my posts, haha! ;)

Other than that, 2017 was a year that was pretty fulfilling and illuminating for me. I held on to my current job, had a promotion, met new wonderful colleagues, connected with old awesome colleagues. I made time for my family, ate more often and went out more often with them whenever I have the time to. I went on my vacation with my friends for the first time instead of just my family and it probably made us wiser about each other.

UNADULTERATED: Voice of a Person Behind the Counter

Image
It has been a while since I last blogged, but not since I last written. I fear that my work has been slowly chewing the part of myself that I feel is most precious to me -- my soul, and the ability to organise my thoughts and place them into words. This is what makes me become slightly human(e) again.

In truth, who doesn't have a love-hate relationship with their job or career? I know I do.

I have talked about this so many times in passing to friends, family, colleagues... but it never ever gets old. Anyone who worked or works in any position that serves customers will have encountered these feelings, one way or another, once or one time too many, in their working life.

I have never understood why people feel the need to shout at a service crew person's mistake. Or the need to make "passing" but demeaning comments. Or to write in and ask a rhetoric question of whether the staff was having bad day, but obviously still wanting the management to take action.



I have nev…

Book vs. Film: The Promise 無極

Image
The Promise 無極 (wú jí), by Jingming Guo 郭敬明 • Published by 圖神出版社 • ★★★★ • Goodreads THE BOOK The interesting thing about the book counterpart of The Promise is that it was written after the movie. The director chose a writer and granted him the creativity to write the story again, but keeping the beginning and the ending the same. This is actually great because the movie, admittedly (on hindsight), wasn't that great in comparison to the book.

Jingming inserted new fantasy elements into the story, which was pretty weak in the movie. He also created an entirely new fighting system and introduced another faction into the power struggle between Wuhuan, Qingcheng, and Guangming. Never underestimate the power of a world that is well-built.

I would like to think The Promise is trying to talk about the circle of life, but it also romanticizes it into a tragedy (of sorts). If you could see your future and your fate, would you believe it? If you believe it, would you just do nothing and se…

Unboxing: Librum Box, May/June 2016

Image
I was extremely pleased with my first experience with Librum Box, which was the March/April box, as I was highly motivated to purchase it due to one of my favourite makers (Baisimu) being involved in that particular box. When the current theme for May/June was announced, I signed up immediately because I love tea. I mean, hey, who doesn't love tea? ;)
Disclosure: This post is not sponsored by any of the artists/makers involved or CLSG. 
What I appreciate most about Carpe Librum is that the box is delivered personally by the team. It's probably tough for them, especially since it was raining the day they delivered mine, but no start-ups are easygoing from the beginning. Kudos to that!
So what is in this couple of months' Librum Box? :D

I left the box overnight before I opened it and I was SO GLAD that the ants did not invade the cookies, because I would have been so sad. (Due to the weather, insects are emerging EVERYWHERE. Argh.)
1. CHOCOLATE CHIPS COOKIES BY DE'COOKIE…

UNADULTERATED: All Sides of A Coin

Image
UNADULTERATED is a feature I created to allow my muddled thoughts to be straightened out into sentences, but often remaining as ramblings with little to no motives behind them. (Also more commonly known as regurgitating thoughts or verbal diarrhea.) There are minimal editing in these posts, hence there will be lots of straying of thoughts and even driving off "topic cliffs". Consider yourself warned. ;)
I have the luck to enjoy company with people who are objective and are capable of seeing different sides of a coin. Recently, perhaps I had accidentally stepped on the train of Lady Luck’s dress, for I have also encountered some people who are rather adamant on their love(s).

That gave birth to this post.

At what point does love and passion turn into rabid obsession? Rabid and passionate are actually synonyms but it’s funny how their connotations set them apart.

Think of a rabid fan, do you get a rather crazed and illogical person? Perhaps.
Think of a passionate fan, do you g…

后青春期的诗:回头看未来。

Image
后青春期的诗 - 九把刀 • 蓋亞文化有限公司 • ★★★★ • Goodreads 你还记得十八岁时有过的梦想吗?
我记得,因为当时的我没有梦想。

十五岁时,我写下了一个十分荒唐的梦想。
当时很疯Gundam,所以想当它的飞行员。
虽然当时只道它只是荧幕上才有的科技,十五岁的我没有任何犹豫地写下。
现在想一想,在未来可能就会有这些机械来保卫国家或探索外星哦。

二十三岁时,又写下了一个梦想 — 我要写作。
比十五岁的梦实际多了,可是好像艰难多了。这是什么鬼逻辑?

努力想一想我的十八岁…

其实,我十八岁时失去了人生的导航。
当时有一位教授(也只有那么一位)问我要不要转科,我不想浪费时间和老豆的血汗钱,所以硬着头皮熬过了、毕业了、漂浮了(要谢谢当时同组的同学包容我的半脑残状态,我才能顺利毕业呢)。
当时没了梦想,如同没了锚的船只,一直无目的在人生大海漂着,不踏实。
可是当时的漫无目的塑造了现在 “我行我素” 的自己,也算得上是一段寻找自己的时间。

【后青春期的诗】叫人情不自禁地回想过去、反省、思考现在、探讨未来。
一年过一年,越来越逼近三十岁。虽然只是个数字,可是自己能感觉身子的变化。
我不担心老去,生老病死是必经之路。
可是我担心的是失去想象力,再加上不喜欢 “心有余而力不足” 的感觉。
我还无法完全无视别人对我的眼神,所以我担心我剩下能疯狂的时间不多。
但是也有可能在四十岁时,真的活得潇潇洒洒。
人生无常,就是这么个事儿。

很庆幸我没有因为之前读了没那么感性的【红线】,而放弃手上剩余的九把刀作品。
(说真的,如果不是因为五月天有张同名专辑,可能我真的不会读下去。)

如果时光能够倒流,我会回到更年轻时,然后放肆地活。
但是如果时光能够倒流,我现在的感慨就可能没了。
两者中,我无法选择。(纠结症是长期的病啊。)

听听歌吧。